In Which I Am Alive

It's been two months since I last went to class.  The summer solstice was nearly two and a half weeks ago. In recent months I've wandered Europe, lounged on a beach in the Caribbean, and logged enough hours at my job at the pool to give me a permanent odor of sunscreen and chlorine.  And yet somehow, it's only been in the past couple days that it's hit me: summer is here.  Maybe it was the nights this week that were spent sitting in the patch of cement in front of my apartment, the patch of grass in front of Panda Express, and the grassy knoll behind my complex's pool. Have you noticed how real summer nights have a different quality than any other kind of night? Not only is the air warm, the light is different somehow...dark without really being dark. And something about it feels not quite like night. Which might be why I've been doing my share of staying up "wayyy past midnight." Maybe it was wakeboarding for the first time this summer. Or lay...

Sometimes my roommates and I like to create casts for movies we wish existed (call it a movie geek's version of assembling a Fantasy Football team). For example, we once created a concept for a film version of  Candyland , directed by Tim Burton and starring Johnny Depp as Lord Licorice, Danny Devito as Plumpy and many others. I feel like it would be absolutely terrifying and 100 percent awesome. Our latest (and perhaps most successful) casting session happened last night as the roommates, practically-roommates and I watched my favorite movie of all time. And so, for your viewing pleasure, I present to you: N311's cast for a live-action adaptation of Disney's  Beauty and the Beast . Beast: Ewan Mcgregor Belle: Anna Friel (Chuck from  Pushing Daisies ) Gaston: Hugh Jackman Maurice: Dustin Hoffman Lumiere: Neil Patrick Harris Cogsworth: Ricky Gervais Mrs. Potts: Melissa McCarthy (Sookie from  Gillmore Girls) Le Fou: Kevin James The guy from t...

Can you tell I've been on a poetry kick this summer? Here's some more favorites: A word is dead when it is said, some say. I say it just begins to live that day. Emily Dickinson Beauty is not caused. It is. Emily Dickinson Forever is composed of nows. Emily Dickinson Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - and sings the tunes without the words - and never stops at all. Emily Dickinson “If I read a book and it makes my whole body so cold no fire can warm me, I know that is poetry. If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry. These are the only ways I know it. Is there any other way?”  ―  Emily Dickinson ,  Selected Letters  

“Do I contradict myself? Very well, then, I contradict myself; I am large -- I contain multitudes.”  Walt Whitman “Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you.”  ―  Walt Whitman “Happiness, not in another place but this place...not for another hour, but this hour.”  ―  Walt Whitman “Not I, nor anyone else can travel that road for you. You must travel it by yourself. It is not far. It is within reach. Perhaps you have been on it since you were born, and did not know.  Perhaps it is everywhere - on water and land.”  ―  Walt Whitman ,  Leaves of Grass “I have learned that to be with those I like is enough”  ―  Walt Whitman “I exist as I am, that is enough,  If no other in the world be aware I sit content,  And if each and all be aware I sit content.  One world is aware, and by the far the largest to me, and that is myself,  And whether I come to my own today...

Um....hi. So, I'm going to the other side of the world again tomorrow...I'm beyond excited. And also I feel a little guilty...what kind of spoiled brat gets to visit Europe twice within a one-year span? This one, apparently. I've been very very blessed with these opportunities to travel, and it wouldn't have been possible without the help of many other people. Parents and grandparents who have offered me financial and emotional support, professors who have helped me prepare academically, Uncle Sam for giving me a fatty tax return, ORCA for giving me a grant...I am one lucky girl.

Some things I should probably stop saying when I describe myself because they're not really true anymore: I'm kind of shy: This was definitely true when I was about 7. It was probably still true when I was about 13. And it was true in some situations up until I was about 20. But to be honest, people don't scare me anymore. I thrive on conversation, love meeting new people, and am not afraid to boldly state my opinion, even when talking to strangers. Sometimes people intimidate me, sometimes I don't feel like talking, but I think my former labels of "quiet," "shy," or "introverted" can be permanently left by the wayside. I'm a picky eater : Yes, as a child I refused to eat stroganoff, fruit salad, zucchini, canteloupe, or fresh green beans. Yes, I used to hide food under the margin of my plate or pretend to throw up to get out of eating stuff I didn't like. However, I'll eat pretty much anything at this point in my life. ...

Looks like I have all the time in the world now...